Best Thing I Heard All Week: Sally Hogshead on The Unmistakable Creative

The best thing I heard this week was guest Sally Hogshead on The Unmistakable Creative podcast. I’m subscribed to the Unmistakable Creative, where the host Srini Rao interviews thought leaders from all walks of life. Although I had not heard of Sally before this episode, her background is right up my alley. She started her career in advertising, and did some pretty amazing client work as a copywriter and creative director. She is an accomplished brand strategist, researcher and author. Her specialty is helping people and brands find their natural advantages. I loved being introduced to her work through this episode.

 

The Unmistakeable Creative Podcast

 

The host of the Unmistakable Creative podcast, Srini Rao, always asks such interesting questions that elicit thought-provoking responses. His interview with Sally was just that. One specific topic I enjoyed was when they talked about her upbringing, and how as a younger sibling to an Olympic athlete and a Harvard graduate, she could have easily been crushed under the weight of comparison. But Sally recounts a moment in her childhood where her dad gave her a piece of advice: “Sally you don’t have to change who you are, you have to become more of who you are.” So wise. I need to tuck that into my back pocket. At 7 years old, she internalized that message so much that her life’s work all seemed to springboard from that advice.

 

Fascinate by Sally Hogshead

 

Sally has a book out call Fascinate: How to Make Your Brand Impossible to Resist that I have now added to my ever growing list. I have always been interested in marketing and strategic messaging. Especially when it is based on psychology and human nature. In the interview (and I am assuming the book), Sally makes so many good points about how to be a fascinating person or brand. Some of the  key points that really resonated were:

  • The greatest value you add is to become more of yourself
  • If you don’t know your value, don’t expect anyone else to.
  • Every time you communicate, you are either adding value or taking up space.
  • To become more successful, don’t change who you are — become more of who you are.

There is so much truth in these statements. Sally convincingly illustrates these points during the Unmistakable Creative podcast interview. She used this knowledge to create compelling advertising work for many years, but has also used it to teach others how to use it in their personal brands. Perhaps you don’t consider yourself having a personal brand, but the fact is we all are seen by the world in a certain way. And if you can take the time to reflect on what your core values are and how to live them to the fullest instead of trying to live the values that are expected, there is a lot of good that can come from that.

Sally’s message would be be helpful for young people as well. It seems that as kids become self-aware, they spend so much energy trying to be like everyone else. To wear what the others’ are wearing, share the same interests and fit in with the pack. It’s almost like a survival mechanism. Which is not only sad but makes it extremely hard to tap into your own unique self as you grow up. After trying so hard to mold yourself into what is expected, it will take a lot of work to rediscover your true self. Assuming you ever do choose to go looking for it.

This Unmistakable Creative podcast episode was a treat for me this week. If you have any interest in marketing and branding you will definitely enjoy this episode. But also take a listen if you need a little permission to let your quirks shine through.

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March Home Project: Living Room Refresh

As I discussed in THIS post, I am trying to just focus on one area of our home per month to help combat the paralysis that sometimes comes with wanting to do too much. Today I wanted to share the progress we made with the living room in March.

I knew going into this month that I was not going to have a large budget to get new furniture. We are dying to replace the oversized chairs against the wall with a camel leather sofa like THIS or THIS. I have also been on the hunt for the perfect coffee table for years. So far, THIS is the closest one I have found that would fit the bill. Realistically, I knew it was going to have to wait for another time.

As I thought about what needed to accomplish in the room, I knew I wanted it to be more neutral. The pops of color I had were just not working for me. An easy way to neutralize the space is with a change of throw pillows. So that is where I started. I usually get my throw pillow covers from Etsy. They have excellent vendors for pillow covers. To make my choices, I picked out all the ones I liked, and then “virtually” placed them on our sofa until I found my winners. Here’s an example of how I do it:

Choosing neutral pillows.

As a reminder, here is what the room looked like before with the colored pillows:

July 2015-3

And here it is swapped out with the neutral pillows. I like how it makes it less busy. More serene. It will look even better when we can swap out the blue ottoman for a nice big square coffee table. Baby steps 🙂
 Living Room Refresh - The Outside & In

Living Room Refresh - The Outside & In

Living Room Refresh - The Outside & In

I also changed out some of the colored pieces on the mantel and swapped them out for more neutral accents. Simple.
Living Room Refresh - The Outside & In

Living Room Refresh - The Outside and In

And one last little change that is not visible to you but still feels good is some good ol’ decluttering. Part of my goal for these monthly projects is to declutter room-by-room. In the living room, all those built-ins house our board games, photo albums and DVD’s. I took everything out, donated or threw out what we didn’t need, and then put it all back again neatly. Ahhh…

Living Room Refresh - The Outside and In

This monthly exercise has definitely been a big help. Not easy, but helpful. Slowly but surely, I am training myself to focus on what I can do versus everything I want to do. It’s forcing me to be realistic and prioritize. However, progress is being made! I am excited to share April’s project with you next.

Have you been working on any house projects lately?

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Recent Read: The Obstacle is the Way by Ryan Holiday

Over spring break I read “The Obstacle is the Way”, by Ryan Holiday. You may recall it was on my 2016 reading list that I posted about HERE. The book is small in size and length, and the chapters are too. It was the perfect little book to bring to the pool and still keep an eye out for the boys.

Review for The Obstacle is the Way by Ryan Holiday

I learned about “The Obstacle is the Way” through podcast interviews with the author, Ryan Holiday. After listening to interviews with Holiday on the Tim Ferris Show and on the James Altucher Show, I knew I wanted to read his newest book. Holiday is young – very young. At only 28 years old he is a media strategist, served as director of marketing for American Apparel and has written several books. At the age of 19, he was introduced to Marcus Aurelius’ Meditations by someone he admired. Meditations is basically the ancient Roman Emperor’s private journal that he kept during the midst of military campaigns. Marcus Aurelius is one of a handful of people credited as the leaders of what is now referred to as Stoic philosophy. If you are anything like I am, the mere mention of the word philosophy makes your eyes glaze over. But this book has changed that. It is absolutely engaging and down-to-earth from page one.

I give Holiday credit for introducing us to the Stoic way of life in such a digestible way. He breaks down the philosophy (and book) into 3 distinct parts: Perception, Action and Will. Within these three areas, he draws from many fascinating figures and examples from history to bring the concepts to life. He then brings it back to the present day by giving advice on how to apply the principles. Let’s take a quick look at each of the three parts:

Part I: Perception

If we want something to change in our lives, the first step is to change our perspective of it. This sounds so simple but can be SO powerful. And true. When events happen to us, we tell ourselves a story about the situation. The fact is, we can change that story at any time!

How we interpret the events in our lives, our perspective, is the framework for our forthcoming response — whether there will even be one or whether we’ll just lie there and take it….Right action follows right perspective.  

I loved the chapter about living in the present moment and not getting caught up in what might happen . Holiday starts the chapter by listing off a roster of Fortune 500 companies who STARTED during depressions or economic crises. Hewlett Packard, Disney, Revlon, United Airlines and many more big names. I would never have guessed that.

The point is that most people start from disadvantage (often with no idea they are doing so) and do just fine. It’s not unfair, it’s universal. Those who survive it, survive because they took things day by day – that’s the real secret.

Once you realize that you are in control of how you choose to see each obstacle you encounter, you can choose to look for the opportunity in even your most frustrating situations.

Part II: Action

After you recognize that the first step to overcoming adversity is perspective, then it’s time to do something. It’s time to act. Holiday makes a point to encourage you to move. Don’t get stuck in fear and indecision. Just move in the direction you want to go, even if conditions are not in your favor. He shares the story of Amelia Earhart, who we all know as this amazing female aviator. We learn that her start was anything but glamorous and she was treated poorly every step of the way because she was a woman. But she wanted to fly, so she took opportunities that were not ideal, because she knew they were just stepping stones on her path to her ultimate goal.

Because that’s what people who defy the odds do. That’s how people who become great at things – whether it’s flying or blowing through gender stereotypes – do. They start. Anywhere. Anyhow. They don’t care if the conditions are perfect or if they’re being slighted. Because they know that once they get started, if they can just get some momentum, they can make it work.

Wow. It’s so true. And definitely something I needed to hear. Over and over in this book, there are simple words of wisdom that resonate.

Progress over Perfection; The Outside and In Blog

With chapters like “Get Moving”, “Practice Persistence” “Do Your Job, Do It Right”, you can probably get the gist that the Stoic way of thinking is not coddling. It’s frank and it’s blunt. It helps open your eyes to the excuses and blame we lean on with every little thing that happens to us. But not only is the onus on us to act, but also to keep the bar high for ourselves despite how others may choose to act. As one of my favorite lines in the book says:

To whatever we face, our job is to respond with:

  • hard work
  • honesty
  • helping others as best we can.

Part III: Will

The third and final component is will. When I think of will, I think mostly of determination and being hard. Being able to weather anything. But that is not how the Stoic philosophy presents it. It’s more like your internal framework during adversity. It’s what is happening on the inside when even the worst may be happening to you. As Holiday describes it,

True will is quiet humility, resilience and flexibility; the other kind of will is weakness disguised by bluster and ambition.

Your will is preparing yourself for the worst. Preparing for disappointment so you can move forward when it happens. To try your hardest, but then, if it doesn’t work out, letting it go. Always being ready to move forward.

The Stoic message is simple: don’t be afraid of the difficulties in your life. The easy and comfortable life may seem appealing, but has its downfalls. Adversity and tragedies can be seen from a different lens and leverage you to new heights. It’s up to you to decide how you will act in the face of failure and disappointment.

I definitely enjoyed reading “The Obstacle is the Way” and would recommend it highly to anyone looking for a jolt of inspiration. If you are looking for a gift for a college or high school graduate in your life, this is the one. A book full of practical advice and a new (ancient) way of thinking.

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Best Thing I Heard All Week – Happier with Gretchen Rubin

The best thing I heard this week was Episode 61 of the Happier Podcast with Gretchen Rubin. This week’s podcast had several topics that made me think about things in a different light, which I think is always the sign of time well-spent. The two topics specifically were over-apologizing and identifying your preference for familiarity versus novelty.

Happier Podcast with Gretchen Rubin

The discussion on over-apologizing was so intriguing to me because I realized I do it often. Just saying “sorry” all the time, without having done something that merits an apology. For example, I think I must say sorry 10 times per grocery trip any time I have a near run-in with another cart. It feels like something should be said, but why is it “sorry”? It doesn’t really make sense. I really enjoyed Gretchen and Elizabeth’s (her sister and sidekick) back and forth on the subject. At one point, Elizabeth pointed out that by saying sorry in hopes to stick in a polite word, you are actually inconveniencing the other person because they know have to “forgive” you for this non-event. Interesting and valid point, I thought. Is it the worst thing in the world? I don’t think so. But can we do better? Probably. With this in mind, I headed out to the grocery store to try not to say “sorry” with every near-miss of a cart. How did I do? I ended up saying it twice! It’s like a nervous tic.

If this is something you don’t do, maybe you’ve never noticed. This commercial captures it perfectly. I will say that although I DO want to stop overusing the word “sorry”, I am NOT a fan of the phrase “NOT sorry”. What is up with that?

The Happier ladies also touched on the subject of being a familiarity or novelty lover and how knowing this about yourself can help guide your habit formation. This is one of the reasons I loved Gretchen Rubin’s book, “Better Than Before” so much. In fact, it was one of my Top 3 Books from 2015. Her perspective is that to establish good habits, you have to know yourself and all your idiosyncrasies. Once you know them, you can use that knowledge to your advantage. Some of the ones covered in the book are: simplicity versus abundance lover, moderator versus abstainer, marathoner versus sprinter, owl versus lark, and familiarity versus novelty lover. So in this episode, they discussed the differences of people being more drawn to familiarity or novelty. Which one do you think you are? I was torn, because I am a homebody that very much sticks to routine. But at the same time, I cannot re-read a book, re-watch a TV episode or a movie I have already seen before. I constantly itch to travel to see new places. So kind of a mix depending on what it is. Gretchen and Elizabeth had a fun discussion around the two, and I was relieved to hear them say they were split in different areas of their lives too.

The Happier podcast is a pretty “solid” listen every week. Not necessarily ground-breaking, but I do appreciate the self-reflective parts of it. This week’s episode was a good one for that. So take a listen and let me know what you think!

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Torreya State Park Camping Trip

Torreya State Park

Two weekends ago we met our good friends for a little family camping at Torreya State Park.  It is about a 3-hour drive north for us and is located on the Apalachicola River.  The landscape in this section of Florida is so different than the rest of the state. There are actually hills and changes in elevation. Which, if you are familiar with Florida, is pretty close to non-existent around the rest of the state. So when we were trying to coordinate a camping get-together with the Buzzetts, who live in Port St Joe, both families were excited to meet up at Torreya State Park. It was the first time for all of us.

Besides the elevation and appearance of being in the mountains, Torreya is also unique in that it has some cool history behind it. It was one of the original 8 state parks created in Florida by the Civil Conservation Corps (CCC) during the Great Depression. The CCC was part of FDR’s New Deal and created to employ young men during the extremely difficult times. In case you are curious (like we were) what the other state parks that the CCC created in Florida were, they are: O’Leno, Myakka River, Hillsborough River, Highlands Hammock, Fort Clinch, Gold Head Branch and Florida Caverns.

Torreya-State-Park-Camping-Trip-III

Ben and I by the campfire waiting for everyone to wake up.

Normally, we are tent campers, but on this trip we actually went RV for the first time. We usually stick to camping in the winter months and try to wrap up our camping season by March to avoid the heat and critters that start coming out in the spring in Florida. So when we settled on the camping date with the Buzzett family, we were a little nervous that it was going to be in April. You just never know what you are going to get. Thankfully, Brian’s parents generously offered to lend us their RV for the weekend. We were so grateful to have it just in case of rain, or even worse in my opinion, heat and humidity. The weather ended up being perfect though. And it was fun to try out RV camping for the first time!

The campground was so lovely and different from others we have been to. First of all, it seemed like there were not too many sites. It was set up like a loop, with an open green space in the middle. Sometimes, campgrounds are just a little snug, and this one felt so much more open. The other thing we noticed is that it was a mixed bag of the types of spots. There were some for RV’s, some for tents, there was a cabin, and a Yurt. In larger campgrounds it seems like they have different campgrounds for each. In the center of the field was a cabin. This cabin serves as the place to check in. Originally though, this cabin served as barracks for the CCC when they were building the park back in the thirties. They have some photos in there which is really cool to see.

Torreya-State-Park-Camping-Trip

The boys taking a breather during our long hike. They loved the streams and big hills to climb.

Torreya-State-Park-Camping-Trip-V

More silly antics from Max during our hike.

On Saturday, we spent several hours on the trails at the park. Torreya has so many different hiking trails to choose from. It feels like you have them all to yourself. Unlike most Florida hikes, these were filled with lots of ups and downs, streams and changing terrains. It’s amazing how many hours kids can walk when the path seems like an adventure.

The Gregory House at Torreya State Park

The Gregory House at Torreya State Park

One other unique feature of Torreya State Park is the Gregory House. The Gregory House is a home that used to be located on a plantation across the Apalachicola River which belonged to, you guessed it, the Gregory family. By the time the CCC was creating Torreya State Park back in the 1930’s, the house had been abandoned. They decided to move it piece by piece  across the river and place it on one of the highest points on the park with a beautiful view of the river down below. The ranger gives tours of the house which  we jumped in on and enjoyed. The house is furnished with furniture from the era when the Gregories lived there. It’s a nice little walk back in time in a very lovely home.

Torreya-State-Park-Camping-Trip-II

Happy campers

The boys had so much fun building forts, walking through streams and playing ball at the campground with their buddies Gannon and Jack.  I’ve talked about it before, but I truly still believe that there is nothing more generous than to give children than free time outdoors. Time to roam, wander and explore. To spend time together without the distractions of television, errands or schedules.

Overall, we found Torreya State Park to be super clean, open and tranquil.  I would definitely recommend it if you are looking for a new camping spot.  Have you ever camped at any of the original eight Florida state parks?

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